gone...

I am now living in an out of body expirience. I dont know where I am, or who I have turned into. There are alot of reasons that could cause this. 1. I am dating a boy that I cannot leave. He loves me. I like him in my mind but my heart will not accept that God allowed me to have such a wonderful person to call mine. He cannot rightfully belong to me, I'm not good enough. 2. I am realizing my heart and mind are just going on as they are used to. They wont let me be different. I hate it. 3. Well I don't know, but thats okay Iguess.